Four signs that your ex still wants to reconnect with you

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People who are going through a breakup often wonder if their ex-partner wants to get back together. Women are usually more likely to do this.

They will be tormenting themselves with a stream of questions for a long time. Does he still love me? If he really wants me back, why doesn't he do it? Why doesn't he try to prove his love?

Expectations and Reality

If you've recently broken up, but the feelings still haven't gone away, then there's a high probability that you'll be thinking about a possible continuation of the relationship. However, you may be full of doubts, wondering whether he really plans to return or just wants to comfort his own ego by making sure that you're still waiting for him.

Girls usually have a huge amount of resentment. They point to the fact that the guy hurt them a lot. And if he decided to come back, they want to make sure that this time everything is for real. However, the truth is that dramatic scenes where the ex, holding his breath, confesses his undying love, and then the couple rides off into the sunset together, are incredibly rare. Like many things in life, expectations do not always correspond to reality.

Actually, getting back together after a breakup isn't that grand. When your ex wants you back, the signs that he loves you are more likely to come in the form of a huff than a roar.

Your ex might be daydreaming about you calling. However, when he does come back, it's often a little different than you'd expect. The reason this happens lies in the dual forces of ego and a concept called cognitive dissonance.

Cognitive dissonance

According to psychology, “cognitive dissonance refers to a situation involving conflicting attitudes, beliefs, or behaviors. It causes feelings of psychological discomfort, which leads to a change in one of the attitudes, beliefs, or behaviors in order to reduce the discomfort and restore balance.”

Generally, what people think is inconsistent with their actions, and they feel terrible until it is resolved. This internal struggle usually manifests as extreme self-sabotage until the person deals with it.

Let's say your ex broke up with you, but then he gradually decides that he can't live without you. He will naturally try to bring his actions into line with his beliefs until the pain becomes too much. For a while, he will remain broken and not be ready to try to get back together again because his actions are in line with his past beliefs.

He doesn't want to go back to saying “I want a divorce,” even if he might eventually do so in the future. The situation will haunt his ex until he decides what to do. However, the seeds of doubt have to take root before anything happens. There are hesitations, mistakes, and behavior that doesn't make sense.

Fear of rejection

Rejection is a huge risk to the ego. That’s why sometimes a guy makes a timid attempt to get back at a girl. He makes a one-time call or text and doesn’t try to do anything else. This allows him to shift all the blame onto the girl, saying that she didn’t take the appropriate action. It’s less painful for the ego than saying, “I never even tried.”

Deciding whether your ex wants you back is a bit like reading a foreign language without translation. Because an ex who wants you back is likely to do the opposite of what you expect.

Four Signs Your Ex Still Has Love for You

He’s Keeping Inconsequential Contact

If you have a child or a business together, it's only natural that you and your ex will keep in touch, but this may be strictly a business interaction. You can communicate formally with each other, solving common problems, but at the same time not feel any emotions, as with all other colleagues or business partners.

In a relationship, when someone is around and trying to stay connected, they often fear that if they let you go completely, you will be gone forever. This means that the opportunity to stay together is lost forever, even if the breakup was their idea. That's why they will do small things and say sweet things like, “I saw this thing that reminded me of you.” Pay attention to these phrases because they may indicate that your ex really wants you back.

He's still resentful of you

Some feelings for you are much better than no feelings at all, even if they are resentment. If he feels hurt or angry enough to confront you, that is a good sign. According to experts, the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference.

That is why you should not worry if your ex is resentful towards you. It just means that all is not lost in your relationship. If he was completely indifferent to you, he would not waste his time on unnecessary resentment. It means that he still has feelings for you, but something happened that hurt him and caused the resentment. Over time, it will pass, and everything will be fine if your ex wants you back.

He continues to explain the reason for the breakup

If someone can't stand you, they won't try to explain to you what went wrong. Instead, they'll give a breakup speech and try their best to never see you again.

Someone who still cares will often come back to rehash what went wrong. This can be a way to take the blame and blame for the breakup on the girl. However, it can also mean that he is trying to make peace, often completely confusing you with what is really going on. However, now you know that trying to make amends indicates that all is not lost in your relationship with your ex.

He talks about his plans for self-improvement

Your ex started losing weight, so he decided to take up that sport you want to try? He probably still wants to keep something in common. In an attempt to fix the mistakes of the failed relationship, your ex-lover is trying to change everything he didn't like about you. It's an attempt to get into a shape that he thinks the person will approve of more.

When your ex shows off all the amazing changes he's made in his life, he's trying to regain some self-respect and show off his best side. Both of these mean he's still interested in what you think.

Now that you know the signs that your ex wants you back, it's time to decide whether or not you should date him again.