How to force yourself to rest if your head is busy with work: the advice of a psychologist

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Get off your smartphone and pet the dog.

Maintaining a balance between work and free time can be difficult – especially for those who are obsessed with achievement and productivity. Clinical psychologist Perpetua Neo shared tips that will help you train yourself to rest instead of devoting a little more time to work.

1. Do what you really like

Leisure is usually time spent with friends, watching movies and series and going for walks. It is useful to analyze these classes to understand whether everything suits you.

For example, think about it: do you watch a TV series because you like it or because it teaches you something, or you just want something in the background? There is a second, perhaps it is worth looking for something that will be really interesting and useful – and that can be discussed later over dinner. In a similar way, it is worth looking at the activity outside the home: maybe you don't like walks that much, but a run is what you need.

Friends are also not always equally close. Perhaps you habitually communicate with a person with whom you would not start a friendship now. And that's okay – just make sure you're still comfortable spending time with him, and that spending time with him doesn't drain your energy.

2. Adapt your vacation to your pace of life

If you're not particularly patient (or just starting to give yourself free time), a 6-hour party with friends can sound like a huge waste of time. But you can always agree that you will come only for two hours. Similarly, instead of going to someone's house, you can always offer to go for a walk and talk instead of sitting on the couch for 45 minutes.

3. Combine rest and development

And no, it's not about self-development and other productive things (which we obviously want to avoid during rest). Turn to activities that give you the feeling that your skills are improving: for example, try to bake a beautiful bread or draw a more complex picture by numbers. The main thing is that you yourself feel progress and joy from it.

4. Try forced rest

Neo notes: “even if I can easily not touch the phone, an inner voice still whispers that I can pick it up and do something useful. But sometimes it is impossible to do this – for example, when I have a massage or a beautician. That's why I regularly sign up for these procedures to ensure that I stay away from the phone.” Similarly, you can think about the situations in which you simply have to do nothing – and adjust them in advance from time to time.

Another piece of advice that psychologists often give to their patients is to join forces with friends who like to command and decide everything for you. If possible, ask them to organize leisure time for you and take you out of the house – and try not to refuse such meetings if you are not busy with something serious. It's not for everyone, but it's definitely worth a try.

5. Think about what makes you smile. It can be a dog that has fallen asleep in a funny position, a cat that runs to meet you when you come home, or the joy on a child's face. Do not deny yourself such pleasures – and now you are not just going for a walk, but going to the park to watch the animals playing. Double motivation!

We are all different, but everyone can train themselves to relax and enjoy it. It is enough to take the first steps – and maybe after a couple of evenings in the company you will realize that you like it much more than sitting at home at the computer.

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