“Red flags” in friendship: what 8 things you must pay attention to
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Friendship is a relationship that has a great value in our lives. Friends inspire us, support us, give us strength. It's about mutual respect. However, there may be people in our environment who make communication toxic and poison life.
Devalues your problems and feelings
Such a friend constantly disregards your opinion and emotions, and belittles or criticizes your achievements. For example, you complain about feeling bad, tired, and in response, instead of support, you hear accusations or a tactless attempt to change the topic of conversation.
Condemns you
Such a person condemns your actions, scolds you for your bad luck.
Talks only about himself
During the meeting, if he asks about your affairs, he mostly does not listen to your answer. Often interrupts and changes the subject.
Criticizes you
Constantly criticizes you and underestimates your self-esteem. It may sound like a compliment, but you feel insulted or humiliated.
Not happy about your successes
Instead of being happy for you and your successes, the person begins to “compete” with you or says you're just lucky.
Does not take responsibility
A person does not want to take responsibility for his behavior, does not respect your boundaries. Instead of apologizing for the insult, you often hear that “it was just a joke” or the accusation that you “perceive everything sharply” or “you don't perceive everything that way”.
Gaslights you< /h2>
When you say that some of the words or actions of a friend were unpleasant to you, in response, instead of an apology, you hear a denial (“I didn't say that”, “You're making everything up, as usual”) – this is a sign toxic relationship.
Does not make efforts to maintain the relationship
Such a friend ignores your efforts to meet or arranges meetings without taking into account your plans and possibilities.
Psychologists advise with friends , in a relationship with which there are such things, completely stop communication or distance yourself.
If you see some of these signs or you feel uncomfortable in such a company, the first thing to do is tell the person what bothers you. Express what it is about his behavior that negatively affects you.
Do it calmly and confidently, without mutual accusations and describe only your own feelings. If the conversation does not produce results and the friend continues to deliberately ignore your requests, it is better to stop such communication.
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