These 6 psychological mistakes make a person poor and lonely

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Skills building relationships with people is very important, because social connections are an inseparable part of our lives, but the efforts spent do not always bring positive results.

Have you noticed that you spend a lot of time solving other people's problems? It's worth thinking about it and trying to change something in your life.

You can't say no

We all have there is an opportunity to say “no”. We say this every day to salesmen, promoters, and serious-faced young people who come to us and want to talk about religion. But sometimes we cannot refuse the request of others when there is a serious imbalance of power. This is bad for either party.

What's happening

Your to-do list for each day becomes much larger than you can handle. Help, advice, shopping, household chores – all this takes up too much of your precious time. Colleagues, neighbors, friends constantly turn to you for help. And, as often happens, this help is one-sided. After all, you will not turn to others for help if you are used to dealing with all problems yourself? If you think about what these people have done for you, you probably won't be able to quickly remember.

Action Plan

Prioritize your own tasks. Sometimes such people try to prove that you are a selfish and ungrateful person, but this is more like manipulation. Next time, before helping others, ask yourself, is it really necessary to save someone all the time? Will this not become a permanent norm?

In most cases, there is no need to say “no” directly. Justify your refusal. If you refuse, it does not mean that you do not want to do it. It's just something that has nothing to do with you. Explain this to your colleagues without making an empty promise. Wish for a successful resolution of the situation if you have to say no. Even if you had to give up, try to give advice or find encouraging words that can help in this situation.

You are always looking for approval

What's going on

You cannot feel confident without the constant approval of other people. You do everything to be praised by your boss, colleagues or friends. If other people approve of your actions, you understand that you did everything right. If you don't get the feedback you want, you feel like you've made a mistake somewhere.

Action Plan

You have to decide that you do everything well and you don't have to prove anything to anyone. Instead of listening to other people's opinions, strive to achieve your goals. Increase your professional level, take care of your health, rest, travel. The habit of being self-confident will gradually become the norm, and your need for someone's approval will eventually disappear.

You try to mitigate all unpleasant situations

What's going on

You never argue with anyone, you never complain to anyone, and you never stand up for your rights. It is easier for you to agree with someone else's opinion, to be patient and calm so as not to cause conflicts. However, this backfires. If you don't speak your mind, it's unlikely anyone will know you have one.

Action Plan

Never seek support from those who have inflated self-esteem. For such people, only their actions are correct.

Show character, state your opinion. If you express your thoughts openly, you will make a statement about your individuality. Earned respect is more important than one-time approval.

You blame yourself for the feelings of others

What's going on

You often feel uncomfortable if you have not been able to fulfill someone's request and have not lived up to their trust. You worry and feel guilty for any negative emotions of other people.

Action Plan

Get rid of the burden you carry for other people. When you feel suffocated by guilt, think about this. What did this person do to at least somehow get rid of his problems?

Why is he always whining and suffering instead of taking action? Why should you help someone who can't or won't solve their own problems?

You don't set personal boundaries

What's going on

You always come to the rescue. If someone has an urgent problem, you put aside your personal affairs, stop halfway, drive across town and solve someone's problems. You can easily change your personal plans, but you cannot refuse to help someone else.

Action Plan

Tell others about your plans. Are you going on vacation for the weekend? Tell them you can help them by Friday. You don't have to make excuses for wanting to rest on your statutory day off. You have to be your own priority.

You have to do things you don't like

What's going on

You are stuck in other people's problems. You rarely say no to requests, so your time is divided into many tiny chunks, none of which belong to you.

Action Plan

Clearly allocate your time when you rest, work or traveling Choose one day when you will do only what you want. Set your priorities and always think carefully before doing someone else's work.

You want to please everyone. But you have to remember that the person who tries to please everyone really doesn't like anyone. There will always be colleagues or friends who are dissatisfied with something. You must learn to say no. The root of your desire to please everyone may be a lack of self-confidence and an inferiority complex. To say no, you need to develop courage and confidence.